Don’t let your want for perfection become procrastination.
I have done this – for most of my life. It has a lot to do with staying behind the mask and only letting the world see, not the struggle, but the victory; not the broken, but the repaired; not the process, but the finished product. That is how it is when I write or speak. I’m guessing that is how it is when anyone who is successful in something finally shares their gift or talent with the world. We only see the result.
But what about the process? What about the journey? As Christians, Heaven is our destination; however, in this life, it’s about the journey. The people we meet. The adventures we go on. The trials, as well as, the victories.
My mind continues to wander back to the forty days that I spent with God prior to speaking at our church’s Christmas Tea. The Tea at our church is a pretty big deal. We had close to 350 women in attendance, plus the gentlemen and caterers who were serving. I had only ever spoken to smaller groups (less than 50), and I wasn’t all that spectacular when I did. In many cases, I felt like I totally bombed! But God had called me to speak, so I (begrudgingly) obeyed.
I spent A LOT of time in prayer!! I knew I couldn’t pull this off, much less do a good job, without God’s power. I told Him as much and He was so amazingly faithful to guide my every step. It was a couple of days before my birthday when I felt Him call me to speak at the Tea. He showed me that from my birthday until the day of the Tea was exactly 40 days. I thought that was pretty cool and wanted to know what that meant – He showed me that it meant that it was time for me to practice what I preach!
Those who have spent any time in a small group with me have often heard me say, “Guard your time with God” and “Know your weapons…Word, worship and prayer!” THIS was the journey He wanted to take me on. Everyday, as I spent time with Him, He would lead me to Scripture that spoke directly to what I was facing that day. He would also place a song in my heart (sometimes to sing back to Him – sometimes as balm for my soul). And I would spend time in prayer, where I could meet Him and He could meet me, face to face.
The women at the Tea only saw the finished product. They only saw what God fully accomplished in my time with Him. They got to hear the forty days of Promises that God provided in my need (which is now in the form of a Love Letter that you can find here).
They didn’t get to see the blood, sweat and tears of the journey. They didn’t see the sheer terror or hear the hours of crying out to God that “I just can’t do this!!!” They didn’t see me broken, laid out before the Lord feeling inadequate and unworthy…a blubbering mess. They didn’t hear all of the lies (though, they did hear some) that I had to admit I had ownership of. The time of repentance. The exercising of faith. The complete surrender.
It was sometimes messy. Often ugly.
We don’t like to show that part of ourselves, do we? Yet, as we all journey through this broken world together, it’s the very thing that needs to be touched by God, oftentimes through the love and care of those He has placed around us.
So, here is what has been on my heart to do (and what I’ve been struggling to begin). I would like to share forty days, here, with whoever struggles with maintaining a quiet time with the Lord (or would just like to understand what “time with the Lord” looks like). I’ve hesitated to begin this journey because whatever I post on the internet I would like to be, somewhat, refined. However, I’m more interested in seeing people begin, or maintain, an intimate (daily!) relationship with God – and sometimes it’s anything but refined!
Everyday, for forty days, I will post about my quiet time with the Lord (Scripture, insights, songs, prayers, etc…). For better or for worse, I would like to share the PROCESS. I don’t know what it will look like, specifically. It will not always be refined, but I promise that it will be REAL. So, I will call the forty days of daily blogging “40 REAL Days with God.”
I’m not working toward anything, specifically (like I did with the Tea). Then again, perhaps I’m working on giving up my want for perfection by simply sharing from the heart and spirit – every day – for forty days. Hmmm…
I hope you’ll join me, daily…or whenever you can!
Here’s to surrendering to God! May His will be done…and all glory, honor and praise to Him!
[40 REAL Days with God will run from Monday, 4/4/16 to Friday, 5/13/16]